Priest in the Church of England. Trustee SPCK. Father, husband, son. "Small acts of Good change the world."

Bliss is a cold shower and a naked old chap

A380 from the Plazza Lounge Kuala LumpurI can hardly begin to describe to you the utter bliss of any kind of shower after eight hours on a 777. Those of you that do the long-haul flying thing will understand that eight hours is about the limit, to then consider doing another 11 hours immediately afterwards fills most people with the heeby-jeebies.

So I find myself in Kuala Lumpur for the second time in as many months, doing 28 hour jaunts to Australia and back. It’s worth it – but only if you can find some way to pass the time in KL.

First time here I discovered a bad cafe with bad beer, bad coffee, and even worse service. I wasn’t looking forward to my second visit. The comparason however is difficult to describe. I’ve discovered that they have an airport lounge (normally reserved for those lucky enough to be flying business class) that you can simply pay to use.

It’s called the Plaza Premium Lounge and costs just 120RM for five hours use. That’s about 20 GBP. Amazing. For this sum I got a cold shower (which here, just over the equator, was rather nice) free food, free diet coke, and most importantly one of the best massages I have ever had.

But unfortunately I’ve aslo had an experience with an aging British chap, who didn’t have anything on. Poor old love thought that the wash-room / shower complex thing was an exlusive deal. He was under the impression that he had paid his 20 quid for full use of both showers, the two toilets, and the two basins. How do you explain to a someone most definately your senior, that perhaps it’s not exclusive, and perhaps, if it’s okay with him, he could maybe put something on his bottom half.

All embarasment was saved however, when he walked out into the reception area (towel now drapped around his mid-rift) demanding to speak to the manager whilst I quickly tried to have a wee before I was thrown out. I’ve never been good at having a wee under pressure, and this was definately pressure. Never mind. I managed to squeeze out a small one, retire back to the lounge and hide behind one of the free PCs to write this.

I don’t think he can see me.


  1. Frank Wales

    So is this old chap huge, then? Otherwise, why are you hiding from him?

    He’s already flashed you, so all he has left is harsh language and imminently fractured knuckles if he tries to plant one on you.

    Enjoy your free drinks, I say.


    I imagine you gave him quite a fright too!

  3. mattcashmore

    Can’t say I noticed how large he was, so to speak, but he was a good deal taller than me and not very happy at all…. I decided to run away… seemed to work!